Thursday, February 24, 2011


Hello Friends,
Today I took what my mom would call a "mental health day". Basically, I just didn't want to do anything but lay around all day. As it turns out our school called an early release anyway, so it doesn't exactly matter. When I lived with my mom we would take these days and have some of the greatest times of my life. We wouldn't ever really do much but our conversations were filled with so many different viewpoints and just weird thoughts. Sometimes we even talked in different voices and continued that conversation in that same voice. Our activities included watching Real Housewives, Kathy Griffin, and eating twice baked potatoes. We may or may not have eaten a twice bake the size of my face for every meal. This does include breakfast and Fourthmeal.
During the winter break of my freshman year there were at least 5 people living in my house consistently each night. Sometimes a few more would join. Even after school started we would have sleepovers and my mom would be in her room all day and we thought she was asleep, so when 3 o'clock rolled around we would rush outside and make footprints in the snow making it appear like we went to school. However, when we got inside she was awake and said "Ha ha nice try, I could hear you girls all day." So our plans never exactly worked out the way we intended. But she always gave us a B for effort. Seriously, that's what she said.
My mom was also obsessed with Christmas. And I don't just mean she really liked it, I mean we had Santa figures up all year long. One day we accidently broke a wooden reindeer. There were four of us trying to fix it and one of us standing guard at my mom's bedroom. When she came out of the room three of them flew down the stairs and tossed the reindeer into my backyard. They through the broken antler with it, and it was never recovered. Eventually we put the reindeer back but my mom NEVER NOTICED. It was so great. It was also the only thing I think I ever got away with.
That is all for now. Enjoy your day!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Uncertain Safety.

It's been awhile so I thought I should update. I also just have the urge to write.
I recently just finished Crazy Love by Francis Chan, which is totally heart changing. That's the only way I can describe it. As I was reading it I had to pause and think on what he was saying and meaning, then I would apply it to my every day thought process. Eventually I just had to finish it so I sped-read through the last half and was in complete awe.
One of the points that he makes is that following Christ can mean different things to different people. Some people feel called to sell everything and move to a third world country, ministering and aiding the poor and suffering, while others should stay right where they are and be the example of a true Christian to the unbelievers surrounding them. And no matter what it is, we shouldn't fear anything because no matter what, God is going to bless us in the end. He promised to never leave us or forsake us, so why would we be afraid?
While I may be young, I am also very passionate for what I know to be true. And Truth is something that should be known to everyone. I am in the stage of my life where I should be preparing for what I want to be doing with my life, and making decisions and back-up plans all of this just to be safe. When people say this it takes almost everything in me not to laugh in their face. I don't want to be safe, I want to be doing what I am called to do. I want to be someone who is living out their full potential in ways beyond academics, and money. Using my life to minister to those who don't know Truth, and to help those who don't have access to things we take for granted. I don't think many people know this about me, but it's been weighing on my heart for awhile now.
Now, don't get me wrong. I still have no idea where my life is headed to after high school. I know what I am wanting to do and what I am willing to do. There are many sacrifices that I am willing to make when/if the time comes for me to make them. I was talking to my sister about it and I told her how I knew the danger my life would be in. But then I realized the kind of danger these people faced every day without the hope of The Lord, and without guidance from the Holy Spirit that many church-goers take for granted and even ignore. That is the kind of stuff that I think about while I should be paying attention during algebra II.
I realize that my dreams might be a little ambitious and could seem out of the realm of possibility but I could make it happen one day. Who knows, I might even change a life.
Thanks for reading.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Family, Andy Samberg, and Cartman.

I haven't posted in a while and I thought that maybe I should. This week has been fairly interesting. I've realized that I have a big issue with people not liking me or having a problem with me. And when I try to fix it, I end up making it worse. So I figure that I should just pray about it. And that'll be that.

I also came to the conclusion that I really miss my mom and my brother. Of course I had people who told me that they would be there to do mom things just like my mom would, but they haven't. So I think that's just something people say. I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer here, it's just the truth. So many people take what's theirs for granted and I wish more than anything that they will be able to appreciate it soon enough. Even just an older brother to play Grand Theft Auto with, or laugh with about how our sisters somehow coordinate every outfit they wear together on accident. These are the things that run through my mind when I watch movies, or see siblings out together.

On a happier note, with the snow days we've been having I've been able to use my time wisely and check out some SNL skits like this one. Oh and you can't forget about lazy Sundays. I really love these too: Part 1 and Part 2. Yep, I watched about a hundred of those these past couple days.

Courtwarming is this Saturday and guess where I'll be? Working. Yep, I was neither asked or invited so I'm chillin at the Rob for the night. I'm not a big fan of getting dressed up. I think our school should have casual dances. Or have the game and then right after that have the dance. That's what my friend's school does and they really like it. Just my thoughts on the situation. Anyway if you have no plans for the night, you should come hang out with me! Lord knows I'll need someone there that night.

Which brings me to work. I work with my older sister and I've been accused of favoring her over other servers. I mean yeah, every once in a while I'll give her an extra table but that's when we're super busy and it's not like anyone would notice. Oh, but servers count other server's tables and if anyone is ahead of them they flip. They don't even confront me about it, just the managers. So I had to have a one on one talk with my manager (who really likes me) and he basically made a joke about the whole thing. It's really frustrating when I get yelled at for not knowing how to do my job by people who have not worked as long as I have. But because they are older they think that they have more authority over me. Screw authority is what I say. This is what I see every time someone tries to tell me what to do:

I again blame my upbringing for this. When the school lost power and nobody was allowed to leave, my dad texted me say "Damn the man! Scale the walls if you have to". These are the times I feel closest to my family.

These are my thoughts. Thanks for reading. Much love.